My willpower is dead. Gone. Nada. Zip.
I have barely studied for my Japan and Asia Pacific, give or take a couple of readings I did 10 thousand years ago that I can barely remember and the few paragaraphs I've just read.
I want to quit. This is like the 1 millionth time I've said those exact words. Mostly I say it but then continue to trudge through the mud and the fire. Usually I survive, barely sometimes. Last year I really did quit and I come thisclose to self-destruction. This year... I fought. Sort of. I fought and I came to this point. And now I wanna quit again.
I know what all of you are thinking - WAT? That would be so wasted!! Don't be daft!! Don't give up!!! Don't be so stupid!! You're so close!!! Ganbatte!!! BANZAI!!!!
People... You're forgetting that this is someone who has got absolutely no focus in her life and who is quite known for running away everytime some great obstacle or conflict comes her way. I have no willpower. Despite what appearances may say and what some people might think, I'm not that strong in the end.
Well... Looks like it's going to be one of those times when I end up disappointing everyone in my life. Again. Sorry about that folks. Thanks for all the love though.
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